5 Hidden Strengths Of Not Fitting In
Society pressures people to want to fit in. Here are the five hidden strengths of not fitting in.
Society conditions people to want to fit in. Since humans are social creatures, they want to go along with the group. This means that people are essentially sheep. It is better not to fit in and be a goat than to go along with the herd. These are the five hidden strengths of not fitting in.
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I cared too much about what people thought about me in my twenties. This may be what most twenty-somethings experience. I even went to events I did not want to attend because I needed to always socialize with my friends. I would go to a sports bar to catch the game to discuss it with my friends the following week. I was not too fond of sports. This was simply a way of me coping with trying to fit in. If I had embraced not fitting in sooner, aspects of my twenties would have been different. But society and people pressure us to conform to fit in with the culture, friend group, or community we may be a part of.
Some rightly refer to your twenties as your “young and dumb” years. The good news is you can learn from your mistakes in your twenties to help set you up in your thirties.
Stop Caring About Social Pressures
First, you learn to stop caring about social pressures. These social pressures can come from friends, family, work, entertainment, media, and popular culture. You may have at one time found yourself conforming to these pressures in an attempt to fit in with others. When you stop worrying about pleasing others, you can start working to reach your goals.
Stop Being A People Pleaser
Second, you will stop being a people pleaser. A people pleaser is someone who is overly helpful or friendly. People pleasers are more than willing to sacrifice their well-being and time to help others. People pleasing is a form of external validation.
When you stop being a people pleaser, you focus on internal validation. This means that you work to invest in yourself. Only by investing in yourself can you truly understand your passion and skills. You can then find ways to monetize both.
Increase Productivity
Third, when you become comfortable not fitting in, you will discover that your productivity increases. You no longer feel the arbitrary pressure to go out to see your friends. You don’t need to keep up with the latest trends or sporting events.
You are more worried about being productive to get what you want out of life. You may work to find ways to increase your productivity to get more out of your day. You may go to bed later and wake up earlier. You may have found a to-do list strategy that works for you. You break down your goals into manageable chunks so you can succeed.
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Focus On Achieving Your Goals
Fourth, you focus on achieving your goals. You will discover that you have more time to work to reach your goals since you no longer worry about pleasing other people. You do not care that you don’t fit in.
You can learn to set realistic goals for yourself. You can set short-term to long-term goals. You can even work toward multiple goals at once. Below is a breakdown of the time frame of different types of goals:
Short-term goals (one month to a year)
Medium-term goals (one year to three years)
Long-term goals (three years to five years)
Extra long-term goals (five years to ten years)
You need to set goals for yourself. It would help if you planned how you would achieve a goal. You will then need to allocate the appropriate resources to help you reach your short-term to long-term goals.
Stop Caring What Others Think About You
Finally, you stop caring what others think about you. You start to recognize that you can’t get along with everyone. There is no reason to try to please everyone. It is an impossible task. You can go on without concern once you stop caring what others think about you.
The best feeling in the world is no longer worrying about others. Their opinions or what they think about you don’t matter. The only thing that matters is you work hard and smart to find ways to improve yourself. As you become one percent better every day, you will begin to accomplish the objectives you set for yourself.
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Summary
The bottom line is that you don't want to fit in. The sooner you learn to embrace who you are instead of compromising to please people, the faster you will reach your goals. This is because you will start to know yourself. The best thing you can do is discover your passion and skills. You can then find ways to monetize them.
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