Respect Is Earned (Start With Zero Trust)
Respect and trust are earned. Many people have forgotten this simple fact. Start with zero trust.
Many articles and polls have been done over the years about the decline and loss of trust in institutions. The problem with many of these articles is they seem to assume that people are supposed to freely give their respect and trust to “authorities,” “experts,” and institutions without question. The reality is that respect and trust must be earned, yet that simple fact seems to have been forgotten.
Zero Trust
You can use a foundational cybersecurity principle when it comes to starting to think about trust. It is called the Zero Trust Model in cybersecurity. You can apply the basic principle of the zero trust framework to your relationships with people and institutions. IBM explains how zero trust framework works:
Developed by John Kindervag in 2010 while a principal analyst at Forrester Research, a zero trust architecture is a broad framework that promises effective protection of an organization’s most valuable assets. It works by assuming that every connection and endpoint is considered a threat. The framework protects against these threats, whether external or internal, even for those connections already inside.
Merriam-Webster’s Dictionary defines trust as “assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something” and “one in which confidence is placed.”
Trust with other people, businesses, organizations, and institutions is internal, and it is an inner belief that you hold about someone or an institution that reflects their character. Once you lose this internal belief between you and an institution, you will likely no longer trust it.
External trust plays a vital role in personal security and safety. If you think someone looks like they may be shady or could cause trouble, you will take precautions to protect yourself. Safety is one of the basic human needs. Trust plays a critical role in determining whether or not you are secure. When you lower your trust, you give another person access to you and your property. To protect yourself, you may take means to increase your security, like learning self-defense, carrying a gun, and adding security cameras around your house. That is not paranoia. It is common sense.
When you start with zero trust, you begin every relationship with people and institutions at zero. That is where it naturally should start anyway. Starting at zero will prevent you from getting hurt. You have no expectations. They have no requirements to meet when you expect nothing from them because you automatically don’t trust the person or institution. This is how it naturally should be, but society has brainwashed people to unquestionably trust people in positions of “authority” and institutions.
You can start at zero trust instead of giving your confidence to someone who has not earned your trust. The same goes for institutions. Trust is earned.
We’re not for everyone.
Respect Is Earned
Dictionary.com defines respect as “to hold in esteem or honor.”
Esteem and honor must be earned. It must not be freely given. Yet, modern society wants people to automatically respect or trust someone because they receive a fancy piece of paper for which they paid too much money by going to college a long time ago. Or, they have a Ph.D. or a fancy title in front or after their name. Or, they work at or for an institution that people have been told they must trust without question. This is antithetical to how respect and trust are supposed to work.
Respect must be earned. You will not trust someone if you don’t respect them. That is why respect is a requirement that comes before trust. Respect is a prerequisite to trust. You also won’t trust an institution if you don’t respect it.
You would not respect someone who does things against your self-interest or negatively impact you. But many people do. Many people allow toxic and negative people to be a part of their lives who harm them whenever they encounter them. They accept the gaslighting by the mainstream media and government. Yet, many people respect people and institutions that go against their self-interest.
Don’t freely give away your respect to anyone or anything. Your esteem or admiration for someone or something must consistently be earned. Never freely give it away.
No one deserves your respect. No one deserves anything from you. Do not freely give yourself away to anyone in any way. That also goes with respect. Don’t just give your respect away to people.
Secure Single’s algorithm recommends:
Maybe we should be talking.
Trust, Then Verify
Once someone has gained your respect and trust, you must continue the process of trust, then verify. This is an ongoing process of continuing to make someone maintain your trust. It would help if you always made them work for your trust.
It would help if you continued to verify their trust. You can do this by continuing to question them. You can continue to remain skeptical. When someone knows they can lose your respect and trust at any time, they will always need to work hard to keep it. They recognize that once it is lost that you will likely no longer be friends with them or use their services for a business or organization, or rely on an institution.
It is in your self-interest to always verify things before blindly trusting people and institutions. This is especially true of people that the public has deemed to be “authorities,” “leaders,” and “experts.” Take a few minutes to do a bit of research to double-check if what they say matches with reality and checks out.
Think for yourself—question authority. Question everything.
Secure Single’s algorithm recommends:
Eliminate People Who Break Your Trust
Just as trust must be earned, you can respect someone, or trust can be quickly lost. The last part many people seem to forget or don’t understand. Once trust is lost, it becomes difficult, if not impossible, to get back.
Once someone or something has broken your trust and you no longer respect them, eliminate them from your life. The same goes for businesses, organizations, and institutions. While you may be unable to eradicate certain institutions from your life, you can find ways to decrease your contact with them.
If it is with a friend or a best friend, you can decide if you want to have a conversation with them about why you are choosing to end your friendship. You can explain your reasoning for ending your friendship. It is then up to you if you want to give them the option to regain your trust or not.
The second and easier option is to block people who have lost your respect and trust across all of your accounts, from your phone to social media accounts. If it is with someone you don’t know very well, this is fine, and they don’t need an explanation for why they are no longer a part of your life.
It can be more difficult with institutions, depending on which one. The reason why it is so tricky is that the majority of institutions are centralized. You could find decentralized alternatives to the central institutions in society that you most likely deal with to varying degrees yearly.
For businesses and organizations, it is more straightforward. You can stop shopping at a company or supporting an organization if they support things against your values. You can then take your business elsewhere. You could start to support a local small business instead of a big box store.
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Bottomline
Respect and trust are earned. People must return to understanding this concept. It does not matter what title someone has or if they work for a prestigious institution that society says you must honor. It's up to you to decide if someone or something gets your recognition. Don’t be afraid to eliminate people from your life who break your trust.
Respect, you don't deserve it
You won't get any from me unless you earn it
Respect, you're not worth it
I'll never be, I'll never be like you
Be like you
Become A Secure Single.
Thank you for sharing.